Scenes From My Surrogacies: A Memoir in the Making

Happy New Year, everyone!  I've changed things up a bit and instead of just posting my memoir excerpts in written form, I'm also offering an audio version for those of you who'd like to hear me narrate the stories myself. I have to say that I really love this addition - I think it adds a little something to the stories - bringing them to life even more, perhaps. 

You can hear the audio version in the SoundCloud link on the picture of the baby, below the text excerpt.

I hope you enjoy it! 

I’d come off the morphine and onto something else that dulled the pain of my incision but didn’t knock me out so completely, which made for a fitful night of sleep. It was challenging given the incision and stitches that left me hesitant to move around too much (and definitely not roll over, which was always one of my greatest pleasures after giving birth), but it was an even bigger challenge trying to tune out all the baby-related activity happening in the bed next to me.

I had always wondered what the transition from couplehood to parenthood was like for people using a surrogate mother, and now I had a front row view of the process, whether I wanted it or not. Which I did, I was convinced, and despite all the sleep I could not get, I was grateful that they actually wanted me to be part of their new role as parents. But at 2am, the hour in which simple, everyday annoyances seem to take on monstrously sized significance, I was questioning my own desire (and judgment) to bear witness to each middle of the night feeding, each diaper change, and each nurse evaluation.  I was exhausted, I was in pain, and I was no longer pregnant with over 15 lbs of baby. I just wanted to sleep and it was my own decision that was keeping me from just that.